Rough week or rather for the pass 2 weeks, sch has reopen 4 weeks and for the pass 3 weeks 1 had tremendous amount of work load pressing against me. Didnt sleep for some nites within this 3 week. Got dignose to have migraine at fiist and then fail the blood donation test becos jus 3 week again I had fever. 2 major indoor show bac to bac really tire me out. Yet I jus wan things to be done nicely. GCD 1 week of rehersal + a Jap Fiesta has enuf problem and miscommunication to burn me out le. Then 4 days of break which I use to do up my project and catch up on sch work tried rest if possible but still not enuf be4 1 noe it Dreams 2 rehersal strikes wif a storm end up running all arnd the place. Well I noe im in no position to complain as the other 2 cordinators did alot more than me thats wat I think. I jus made sure my part is nicely done.

Be4 I thought schedule has loosen for next week but it isnt Art Fest is here I oso dunno y when im not involve but im doin so many things. Checked the system and stuff like that today preparing for art fest planned nicely for the thurs show as it my new sub comm IC show, oso TP rawks fall on that week.

This week some1 told me that my character is intemidating to ppl, am I really that prideful or that arrogant that ppl hate me :( Guess im destine to lead a lonely life. Sometimes i really wish that I can go bac and be a kid when I can even feel happy by eating a cup of jelly. Maybe that jus how much I long for happiness that dun even seem to come. I had lost track of myself. My heart is colder than anything on earth now. It jus so difficult to feel happy now :( I havegiven up.

Today I finally cant hold bac my weakness and finally breakdown infront of everybody after that show. Have i reach my maximum limit? I dunno but wat I noe is even my condition that time can turn into a chit chatting topic for the ppl arnd me WOW *sacarsm*. There is more work to come next is art fest followed by open hse and alot more + next sat still have an outdoor event that I got notice more than 1 month ago. Works piling up like nobody's business next week 2 test haven study, need hand in 2 report next week, need to do 1 project next week, meet fayanne next week everything next weekargh im goin crazy can some1 spare my life. Yet I had ppl complaining bout things not done whereby me here didnt even say anything jus making me more fan cos it remind me of how much my work is stacked up :( Im fainting soon guess no1 noes how I feel now. Its a sheer cold and lonely feeling rite now.